The walk to the parking lot felt like stepping into a different dimension. The cool afternoon air should have been refreshing, but it felt like a shock against my skin, which still carried the lingering heat of that room. Every step away from the spa felt like a betrayal of the reality I was supposed to belong to.
“That was exactly what I needed,” my girlfriend said, stretching her arms and smiling at the sky. “The therapist I had was so good. How was yours, Love? You seem… quiet.”
I forced a smile, the muscles in my face feeling stiff and unnatural. “Yeah. It was great. Just really deep tissue, you know? I’m just a bit spaced out from it.”
The lie tasted like ash.
The Weight of a Secret
As we got into the car, my hand instinctively went to my left wrist. My fingers brushed against bare skin where the woven cross bracelet had been for years. The absence of it felt like a physical weight. I had left a part of myself back there, clutched in Angie’s hand, and in return, I carried a secret tucked away in my phone, a digital ticking time bomb.
I glanced at my girlfriend as she hummed along to the radio, talking about where we should eat dinner. She was the same person I’d loved for years, but the world suddenly looked different through my eyes. I felt like an actor who had forgotten his lines, playing the role of the “perfect boyfriend” while my mind was miles away, replaying the look in Angie’s eyes.
A Different Kind of Hunger
We sat across from each other at a brightly lit restaurant, the clinking of silverware and the chatter of other diners filling the space. But the noise felt distant. My mind kept drifting back to the dim light of the massage room, the scent of peppermint oil, and the frantic, desperate rhythm of those final five minutes.
Every time my phone vibrated in my pocket, my heart skipped a beat. Was it her? No, it couldn’t be. Not yet.
I looked down at my plate, but I wasn’t hungry for food. I was hungry for the rush, the danger, and the mystery of the woman who now held my bracelet. I realized then that I wasn’t just worried about getting caught, I was already waiting for the next time I could step back into the shadows.
The sun began to set, casting long shadows across the table. I knew that once I was alone, once the world went quiet, I wouldn’t be able to resist. I was going to make that call.
Mike m. luster 